How Death Brought Us Together
by Lauressa
Summary: When Harry comes to the realization that he is unable to complete the task that the order has placed upon his shoulders, killing, he makes a wish for a different chance. Unknowing that his wish has set off a chain reaction. Set at the end of DH. SLASH
1. The Vortex and the Wish

Chapter 1: The Vortex and the Wish

The feeling of loneliness is possibly one of the most powerful and horrible emotional states to be in. It is like being sucked into a vortex of darkness, with the winds ripping and tearing at your skin. Each time you turn and try to protect yourself there is another gust right behind you willing to take advantage of the opened and exposed area that was unintentionally uncovered. Screaming at the top of your lungs for someone to try and help, but they just walk right by. Unaware of the lonely person, who is crying on the inside, waiting to be noticed by someone... anyone. Loneliness is very easily hidden, very rarely do those experiencing it cry on the outside. Rather they choose to hide it and slowly have their insides corroded.

I have spent a lot of time thinking about this one feeling, especially since I have experienced it every day of my short 20 year life. My life before the incident involving my parents surely was a happy one. The pictures that I have been given are proof of that. In every single one I am smiling and laughing. Right up to that night, I imagine. Then of course… everything changed. They died and I was sent to live with my Aunt and Uncle and their son, my cousin. During that decade there must have been a point where I didn't understand why my feelings of happiness and joy where replaced by loneliness and isolation. There must have been a moment when I thought about my parents and was confused about why these new caregivers looked at me with disgust and fear instead of the undying love that I was used to. Unfortunately I do not remember that moment. Maybe it is a good thing. If I did then I would have, perhaps, have the memory of that fateful Halloween night and everything that was involved. Instead, my first memory is that of being in a small cupboard listening through the slots on the door and my uncle screamed at me for being unable to control my "freakishness" and how I was not going to get any food that night. I remember how hungry I was and how much I wished I understood what I did and why I was a freak.

Freak… In that whole decade I remember having being called only two names by my family, freak and boy. Never was I called Harry and never was I called anything nice like they called Dudley. I was a shadow in that house. I ate leftovers from my family, wore my cousin's hand-me-downs, slept in blankets that no one wanted, played with toys that Dudley had smashed beyond use, and when I was old enough, worked and cleaned after my family. I washed the car, weeded the gardens, cleaned and dusted the house, painted rooms, cooked three meals a day, did minor repairs on the house, and organized the mess that the other occupants of the house caused. All while being a ghost. No interactions with the neighbours or my family's friends were allowed. I was the freakish nephew who was ultimately labeled as disturbed. It took me a long time to realise that not every home was like this and it made me feel even more alone. School for me was a nightmare, Dudley made sure of that. The students' fears of him insured that no one ever came near me, nor try to help me if he decided he wanted someone to bully. I remember coming home in the first grade, bloodied and bruised from an afternoon bullying session, with Dudley. I was blamed, me and my freakishness.

My life for those years was pretty much the same. It repeated itself over and over again. Random bouts of starvation and being tossed around and bullied, but for most of the time I was ignored by everyone. The vortex I was in was continuously growing and becoming more and more vicious. It attacked me from all sides and pulled my down. No matter how hard I kicked and screamed and tried to claw my way out, the vortex was always stronger and I found myself growing weaker. Then, the summer I turned 11, everything changed. It was as if my life finally found meaning and I had hope. All the accidents and my freakishness were explained by my first friend in my life. I was a wizard. He introduced me to a world of fantastic creatures and impossible feats. For the first time in my memory I was happy. In fact I was more than happy, I was overjoyed. I was going to a school with people like me. People who could make things happen magically.

There in that world I made friends and enemies alike starting with that first train ride. Ron and Hermione my true friends were made during that first year of Hogwarts. Together the three of us have been through so much and I am internally grateful to them. Never have I told them how much they saved me from the vortex. The wizarding world helped, but I was sent back to that house every year, and every year the vortex reappeared. It was especially bad when I was not allowed to have contacts. I was all alone in the house, reliving my first ten years with them in two month intervals. Dudley at least had stopped the physical bullying, but for most of the years there I was locked in my room. Not allowed to leave except for bathroom breaks. The four walls seemed increasingly blank each year and the boredom and loneliness I felt at those times was almost unbearable, especially since I had the knowledge that there was a world beyond this that accepted and loved me. I returned to Hogwarts and my friends every year more and more grateful to them.

While the wizarding world was a source of my happiness, it was also the source of my greatest despair. I also heard about my parent's true death and the man who killed them. _Voldemort_… Even now, his name causes a swirl of emotions; rage, anger, determination, sadness, and despair, as well as pity. Thinking about it now I think that emotion is one of the strongest things I feel about him, second only to anger. I find myself thinking about his childhood. He must have had his own vortex to deal with, but the wizarding world and his lack of friends prevented him from escaping it as I did. The feelings he must have felt when he was growing up, and no one being there to help him surely was at least part of the reason for his downfall. What must it have been like, having no one to save you? However, no matter how much I pity him, the rage I feel when I hear his name covers it up. He destroyed my life, killed my parents, and has attempted to kill me almost every year at school. He indirectly caused the death of my godfather, and the destruction of many people's lives both physically and emotionally.

Yet... I have come over the years to recognize the bizarre similarities between us. He, in his sixteen year old self, also seemed to have noticed in the Chamber of Secrets. Both of us are orphans, parsletongues, and even similar appearance. How odd it seemed to me back then, without the knowledge of Horcuxs at that time, to explain these differences away as Dumbledore did. Even now, with that piece of Voldemort's soul gone from his body, the remnants of his magic and the connection still remained. The shock that I had when I realized that I could still speak to snakes, even without that piece of his soul had shocked and disgusted me. After the battle of Hogwarts, when the man had stood in front of me as I explained how I was the master of the Elder wand and Voldemort, being the coward he was, had sent up a blinding white light and escaped through a blasted out window, I had assumed that all trace of any connection would disappear along with the soul. Of course, I could not be that lucky, his magic left a great imprint on me that it appears I am unable to shake off. The connection is not as strong as it once was, but an occasional vision of torture still leaks through, despite me attempts to relearn occumacy with Hermione. It seems that I can block almost everyone out. Except, of course, the one person I need to keep out.

For that I hate him even more, how I am unable to ever get rid of him from my life. That man who destroyed so many lives and instilled so much fear into the minds of the people in the wizard world, that 10 years after his supposed death they were still afraid to even speak his name, everyone except Dumbledore of course, my grandfather like figure in my life. Dumbledore, the only person that Tom Riddle ever feared, was dead. Killed by his own means. The bravery that man had, to plan and devise his own death so that he could save a young man's soul, I find it hard to comprehend at times. Although he died over four years ago, his death seems to affect me in the same way as it did back then. Especially since his plan to kill Voldemort failed, and there was no backup plan, the discussion on the platform and Snape's memory are proof of that. Snape, the man who I misjudged so much and didn't even know it until after his death, is most definitely on my mind a lot. The amount that man went through in his attempt to keep first my mother, and then me, alive is incredible. He is my saviour more times I can count, and I have long forgiven him for the cruelty he used to treat me with when I was at school, especially after seeing his memories and how much he hated my father.

Thinking of my past won't bring everyone back from the dead; Snape, Fred, Tonks, Remus… all dead in the battle of Hogwarts, while the man that everyone wants dead managed to escape unscathed. Laying herein a bundle of blankets that the Weasley's have offered me for the night I resist the urge to start sobbing and screaming at myself in rage. Why couldn't I have just fired off those words and killed him while I had the chance instead of practically allowing him to escape. The answer is deep inside of me and I know deep in my heart that that answer is the true difference between me and Voldemort; my ability to love and my inability to kill another human being. I know that I can never direct the killing curse at anyone. No matter how twisted and inhuman they have tried to become, they are still human.

"Bloody hell…" I whisper quietly, trying not to wake and burden the other that is also sleeping in the room and the rest of this house with my troubles and inabilities. My inability to kill… The only way of defeating Voldemort is to somehow get him to kill himself, or have him die by some spur of the moment accident that I usually end up instigating. I sigh in frustration. The saviour of the wizarding world isn't supposed to have any weaknesses or troubles with destroying the mass murderer that is currently roaming our world.

I try to distract myself from my troubling thoughts and reach for my glasses that are on the floor next to my head to try and make out the details of the room I am currently occupying. Putting the familiar spectacles on the room becomes focused and I try to study the room to clear my thoughts of the past discussion with myself. Ron's bedroom seems even darker than usual but that may be perhaps the mood of the world at this time. The Chudley Cannons vibrant orange theme of the room can't seem to brighten it even with the moonlights help that is streaming through the window. I turn my gaze from my position on the floor beside Ron's bed to the window. His heavy snoring is finally acknowledged by my ears and I choke back a surprised gasp. The window once again draws my attention and I see a bright vibrant moon shining back at me.

I start shifting in my makeshift sleeping bag made with blankets and a pillow given to me by Mrs. Weasley for the night since I was too tired and drunk from my 20th birthday celebration hosted here to floo or apaparate anywhere. I finally untangled myself from the blankets and slowly stood, quietly making my way to the window, to gaze at the moon. I finally got to the window and leaned against the frame taking in the sight. It wasn't quite a full moon, but it was close enough to give off the illusion, especially since it was quite bright. Or it could be, once again, just because of the darkness that surrounded it which seemed darker than usual. I should know. I haven't had a good night's sleep since the battle of Hogwarts, being given the choice to sleep with nightmares or stay awake. I took the latter of the options especially since the Dreamless Sleep potion had long since had any effect on me. So I try to stay awake as long as possible, thinking, reading or watching the moon until the time comes when I have to sleep and relive the battle that took so many lives. I knew when I was forced to spend the night I wasn't going to sleep tonight, I always wake up screaming and I don't want the rest of my friends to know that the boy who lived is faltering.

Reaching for my wand that I have always attached to my left wrist I quickly cast a tempus charm to check the time. _August 1__st__ 2001 2:46:34 AM. 35… 36… _Putting my wand back I remember that party that was just held for me. The forced smiles and stress that was temporarily put on hold for a dinner that was better than anything I had eaten for many months. Everyone tried to celebrate and try to not talk about the war, but of course between dinner and dessert the discussion had happened. They all wanted to know what I was planning to try and take down "_You Know Who"_. I once again had to say that I was still working on a plan and thankfully Hermione had taken pity on me and came to my aid. As the cake was placed in front of me I was told to make a wish. I looked around I knew what everyone expected me to wish for; "_I wish Voldemort was dead"_ or something along those lines. But I had been saving a wish for tonight, my last hope for a miracle. So I leaned down and blew out the candles...

Ron suddenly released an exceptionally loud snore and shifted in his sleep. I quickly turned around and dove into my sleeping bag mess and pretended to be asleep, just in case he woke up. Thankfully he simply kept on snoring and I released a quiet sigh. Deciding that I might as well just stay laying down I picked up the pillow and placed it at my feet while quietly shifting and turning around so that I can still lie down and gaze at the moon through the window. While gazing at the moon I thought of the wish that I had given and cast into the world as I blew out the candles on my 20th birthday.

"_I wish I had another chance at a different life with no one to kill…__please__…"_


	2. Uncomfortable Discussions

Chapter 2: Uncomfortable Discussions

Morning came far too fast for me. I was still daydreaming about different ways my life could have been different when Mrs. Weasley knocked quietly on the door before popping her head in.

"Harry? Are you awake?" She quietly inquired, trying not to wake her son, who she knew was still asleep and would be for a few more hours.

"Yes, Mrs. Weasley?" I replied, equally as quiet. Both of us knew how grumpy and moody Ron would be if he woke up earlier than his normal wake up time, even if it was ridiculously late for everyone else in the house.

"Harry, before you leave Arthur and the rest of the order would like to have a quick word with you in the kitchen. Nothing to worry about dear, they just have a few questions." She whispered, almost apologetically before her head disappeared from the door way and the door slowly closed with a quiet click.

Sighing, I quietly untangled myself from the blankets for the second time that night. I should have known that the inquiry from them yesterday about my plans and my inability to answer their questions yesterday would not have gone unnoticed. Standing in the now sunlit room, I stretched to try and get rid of the crick in my back from lying on a floor all night. With a satisfied crack, I reached for my shirt on the floor beside my mass of blankets before walking to the door, across the hall, and into the washroom.

My reflection in the mirror, which was thankfully silent as if knowing my need for a moment to think, stared back and I was shocked at how much my body had changed from the last time I had looked into a mirror. Granted that had been a long time, I avoided mirrors as much as possible nowadays since I knew how tired and worn out I look. But this reflection I saw was worse than I had imagined. My face seems longer now, thinner, with dark circles under my eyes from my lack of sleep. My hair, as always, was a mess sticking out in all directions. Thankfully I had let Hermione cut my hair a few days ago since she was fussing about how much I looked like a girl with my shaggy hair style. Now my hair was only about an inch or two in length, and was always sticking straight out. My scar stood out against my pale skin and dark hair. My eyes, while still a vibrant green, seemed duller. While any trace of red in my cheeks or lips was gone. My eyes traced down my face, neck and finally reached my torso. Ribs stood out against my skin and any trace of my Quidditch body was gone, only to be replaced with a skinny and scarred one. The scars were from various activities of my life. The one on my wrist from the graveyard, a few on my back were from Dudley, some on my stomach were from Quidditch, but the vast majority were from the battle of Hogwarts. There were more, thankfully hidden by my jeans that I had worn for the night, that were just as bad as the ones on my torso.

I closed my eyes as I reached for the tap and turned on the water. Splashing the coldness onto my face, I felt the stubble. I needed a shave when I got back. I had tried to let it grow out once, to see if I could get away with being lazy about that. But the appearance and feeling had just felt wrong. Looking up at my reflection I pulled out my wand and cast a glamor spell that I have gotten so used to when I am around others. Now the circles under my eyes were gone, as were most of the scars and my body now had the appearance of being slightly fuller and healthier than before. It wasn't worth it to get everyone worrying about his appearance, especially since they had started to realize that I had no plan to get rid of Voldemort.

Remembering the group that was waiting downstairs for him I grabbed my shirt and pulled it over my head. I was a simple black t-shirt; I really never had been one for fashion or matching my clothes together for that matter. So I had just bought clothes that seemed to look alright with everything. Taking one more glimpse at my appearance in the mirror to ensure the glamor was still there, I opened the bathroom door and slowly made my way downstairs.

I stopped in front of the room Hermione and Ginny had been sharing for the night, thinking about whether or not I should see if they are still in there. I doubted it; they were most likely downstairs waiting for me. Ginny… after the battle, I had tried to make it work. We dated for just under a year, and trusted and loved each other completely, enough to finally give ourselves to one other completely. But the burden I was carrying was too much for our relationship. I tried to keep us together, but Ginny knew how much weight was on my shoulders and how I could never love her fully until it was finally over. She was the one to end it, saying that she couldn't wait for me to anymore. She had to move on. Now she is with another guy, and she seems happier than ever, especially considering the mood of the world. I miss her, but I understand why she left and moved on. My responsibilities and burdens are much too difficult for me to handle, let alone her, so I let her go.

While mine and Ginny's relationship had ended, Ron and Hermione's had flourished. They really were perfect for each other and they really needed each other. Her smarts and levelheadedness was the seamless match for Ron's lack of book smarts and hotheadedness. They have been around each other constantly since Hermione had kissed him during the battle of Hogwarts. I really am envious of their love. I experienced something close to that with Ginny, but the way that they look at one another… I can only hope that one day I can find someone to share that with. However, I have to get rid of my responsibilities to the wizarding world first I suppose.

Remembering why I was making my way downstairs, I shook off my unattainable dreams and continued to head down the stairs. Thankful that the Weasley's had so many stairs I began to formulate a possible plan to defeat Voldemort at a whim. Perhaps there was a part of the prophecy that could be interpreted differently or perhaps there is another power that I have the Voldemort knows not? This is highly unlikely and I find myself hissing in frustration. Turning around the last corner I decide that my best way out of this is to simply say that I have several plans in progress and each one needs to be carefully considered before I choose one to act on. Yes, this will have to do.

Finally, I make it to the kitchen of the Weasley's home. The small room seems even more cramped now that there are several fully grown adults being forced to sit in the room. Molly is the first to notice me and she quickly clears her throat to gain everyone's attention. The chatter in the room quickly ended once I was noticed and Mr. Weasley gestured for me to sit in the chair at the head of the table. I quickly do and take a quick opportunity to look around the room. Mr. and Mrs. Weasley sat on my right and Percy stood behind them. Next to him was a very pregnant Fleur with Bill standing beside her in an almost threating way. But that was just the protective wolf coming out to protect his wife and child, no matter whom else was in the room. Charlie was sitting next to his parents and he seemed by far one of the happiest to see me, offering up a cheerful hello upon my arrival which I returned. On the other side of the table was Hermione and Ginny. Both girls were smiling at me in a way that reminded me that this talk was not going to be a pleasant experience. Yet they both showed their support. Next to Ginny was her new friend, although I couldn't see it, I knew they were both clasping hands under the table and he was staring at me the way he always does. Sure that I am going to steal her away from him at the next chance I have, the gaze is confident and unwavering, trying to show that he can hold his own next to me. I look away, trying to show him as I have been for several months that I am no longer a threat to him, she chose him.

Beside him was a solemn Kinsley. As minister for magic during these dark times he had begun to show very rapid aging that can only be caused by a stressful job such as that and the whiteness of his hair and wrinkles on his face was proof. Finally there were other ministry employees in attendance, about seven of them, I was sure I had been introduced to them at one point but I can't remember their names. Usually those people came in with Kinsley and ended up being killed in some way, usually by running into Death Eaters. They were usually quickly replaced. That was one of the things I really hate about the Order. How dangerous it really was and how they brought in just about anyone to help without thinking about how they would deal with the dangers. We did need these people though; they provided information and support with our cause, as bad as it sounds.

In the back corner, sitting in between the stove and the sink in the shadows of the kitchen, was George. Everyone knew who was hit hardest by Fred's death. The joke shop had continued to stay open in Diagon Alley even after his death with George hiring a few more people to work the shop instead of him. He still lived above the joke shop; I assume it is because it keeps him close to Fred and his memory. The front of the joke shop had shifted into a mural. It had started about a month after the war ended, when George stood in front of the store and put up a banner which read; "In memory of those who died in the battle of Hogwarts and before for their cause", and underneath he wrote "Fred Weasley". After that day, witches and wizards from all over traveled to the shop and wrote the names of the various witches and wizards that had died in the fight against Voldemort. On the side of the list there was room for comments and messages. Most were posts of memorials, but some were written to me, wishing me luck and so forth. The store has become a great inspiration for the Order and for me… There have been a few attacks from the Death Eaters, but it seems the raw emotion coming from the people who wrote on its walls have protected it, much like I was protected by my mother's sacrifice.

"Harry we were all just wondering if you have a plan developed yet, because if you do we want to start developing strategies as soon as possible." Kinsley stated, interrupting my thought process. He was always straightforward nowadays so I tried not to seem startled, but I knew this was the reason for this meeting.

"Well sir, I have a few going through my head right now, but I need to consider each one carefully before I choose to act on one." I lie smoothly, just like I rehearsed as I came down the stairs. However it just started dawning on me that they would probably want to hear some and it is now that I decide that it is time to panic. Sure enough…

"Do you want to tell us some so we can help with the process? All your time alone thinking can't be good for you." Arthur quietly asks genuine concern in his voice. Several of the others in the room nod in agreement and I can't help but start to fell glad to have people care about me. However, now is the time that I need to quickly come up with plans, so I start of in an explanation of why some won't work hoping to buy some time.

"I have some ideas, but most have some undesirable and unnecessary risks for all involved. Because it's not like we can just corner a few Death Eaters and say 'take me to your leader' right? Just like we can't start a random conflict somewhere and hope that they call Vol- You Know Who correct?" I corrected after quite a few in the room shifted uncomfortably and gasped. "There are just so many things that need to be taken into consideration" I concluded, hoping that he at least proved to the others in the room that he was at least trying to come up with a plan.

"Indeed… perhaps though we could go with you last option you gave… But possibly set a trap for You Know Who for when the Death Eaters call him and he arrives. At least it's a start" Kinsley stated, and I was thankful that he at least bought into what I had hoped for. However the plan he chose was not exactly the smartest and I wouldn't help but point out that he was underestimating Voldemort.

"He will suspect a trap, he would be able to see it coming a mile away and that's the problem. I don't know how to get around that." I reply, trying to make it clear that any attempt to try to outsmart Voldemort this way would be a suicide attempt.

"Perhaps… unless we are very careful about it… A trap does seem to be the only option at this point however. And once he is trapped you will have to choose a spell or alternative way of killing him to make sure that he stays dead. Personally I believe the killing curse is the most easily and mess less way, but if there are any other options let's hear them now." Kinsley asks the room. I sit there frozen; he had just told me that he thinks I should kill Voldemort with the killing curse because it is the easiest.

"Well sir, using the killing curse is the most fastest and easiest, but it just seems too easily to let him off that way. Maybe we should let a Dementor kiss him and remove his soul?" One of the ministry employees answers to Kinsley's call. I have yet to move, I am completely unable to comprehend that we are discussing various ways of killing someone.

"That wouldn't work Hunterson, the Dementors are under You Know Who's influence. Besides that would involve holding him long enough for that to occur and I doubt it would be so easy. No, I think Harry should just end it there." Mr. Weasley butts in, with a nod in my direction as if to try and make me feel better. I don't. In fact I am starting to feel sick.

"But I do agree that it would be a shame to just end it right away, he must suffer for all those people that he has killed, and otherwise there is no justice. Maybe we could just do a little bit more damage before Potter ends it." Another ministry employee speaks up, and I can't believe it. Did she just suggest…?

"You think we should use torture first? Forgive me but I don't think that is really necessary. Don't get me wrong, I will rejoice the day that Harry finally rids the world of You Know Who, but is torture really necessary?" Bill asks from the corner. I can tell that he is disturbed by the idea. I don't think nearly as disturbed as I am however. They are actually suggesting torturing and maiming the Dark Lord, before I have to kill him. The feeling of sickness is growing.

"He must pay for his crimes somehow, and I do believe that doing what he has done to others onto in is the best way. Mr. Potter of course can decide what spell he wishes to use, and which is most appropriate to execute this torture. May I suggest…." I fade out of the conversation at this point, unable to listen anymore. I have apparently been chosen by fate to not only kill this man, but torture and destroy him as well. I am going to throw up... I can't bring myself to speak, or move for that matter. Deep inside my chest something is nagging me and reminding me of my recent revelation. I won't be able to kill anyone. My chest is about to explode with guilt and incomprehensible sadness and disgust at myself and those at the table, for different reasons. I wonder if they can hear themselves talk about killing and brutalizing another person so calmly and collectively as if they are talking about a stormy day outside. However, I know that I should, and owe it to the wizarding world to destroy the man who has given them so much grief. I know now that I am not the idealized Chosen One that everyone wants me to be, to complete the one task that they wish me to complete and this by itself is destroying me on the inside. I have no idea how I would ever be able to break it to them, or do I just wait until it is time only to tell them then.

The wish that I made yesterday pops into my head and begins to swirl in my brain. _"I wish I had another chance at a different life with no one to kill…__please__…" _Had I meant it? With all my heart I knew the answer now… Yes.

Before I could comprehend the startling recognition of my choice that I had decided upon in my head, there was a white blindly flash of light that appeared before my eyes. My first thought was that someone had tried to get my attention, but the screams and surprised yelps around the room seemed to disprove any thoughts of that. The light was blinding yet the feeling in the air was much more surprising. It was as if someone had just released all of the energy and magic of their being and allowed it to float aimlessly around the room. The feeling of it swirling around me was making me very dazed and confused and I could hear the others complaining of the same feeling. The dizziness intensified tenfold and I could feel myself start to pass out from the feeling. The last thing that I felt, before the feeling disappeared suddenly was, the sensation of being lifted off my feet, and the others around me screaming at the sensation. Then the light was suddenly gone.

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	3. Gwendolyn and her Interventions

Sorry for taking so long to update guys, First year of University, enough said. This chapter, to me at least, is going to be one of my least favourites. This is because I introduce Gwendolyn in this chapter, and she is… really just a necessary character to get the ball rolling. Not only for the story but all the relationships involved. So if you read this and start to roll your eyes I am sorry but this was the only way into the story that seemed somewhat decent. Even if it involves… well you'll see. Keep in mind that she will not appear again for a while, and when she does it will most likely be for a line or two and then it's back to the characters that we all want to read about and all that. The next chapter will be so much better with her gone. I promise!

PS: I made a teeny tiny mistake on the last chapter that has been resolved. I left this weird symbol thing in the place where the whole Ginny's boyfriend thing should have been. It hasn't changed that I haven't mentioned his name but it's no longer this weird thing in its place. Sorry I must have skipped over it.

PS- Harry has really bad language… don't take offense please.

Chapter 3: Gwendolyn and her Interventions

The light had temporarily blinded me and I found myself blinking rapidly trying to desperately see my surroundings. My other senses were thankfully not impaired so I decided to rely on those for the time being. First thing that I noticed was the saltiness of the air, it invaded my nostrils and I could taste it. Which lead to my first realization, I was near the sea. Then I could hear the voices that surrounded me as others began to snap out of their shock and attempt to ascertain their situations. The confusion and panic that was in their voices was obvious and my first instinct was to reach out to find out who else was near. Reaching out through the damp air I could feel the harshness of the sea wind. I recoiled and attempted once more to see.

"Harry?" A female voice asked and I turned to my left to see a faint outline of a bushy haired girl at my elbow.

"Hermione?" I replied, already certain of who it was, but just wanting the confirmation.

"Yes. Harry, I can't see anything but outlines, can you see anything else? There are far too many people here than to be just from the Burrow." The panic and helplessness in her voice startled me. I began to understand and agree. There sounded like, at minimum, around 40 people, far more than could fit in the kitchen we were just standing in. Blinking again I could finally see everything come into focus and I began to recognize the people surrounding me. I turned to look at Hermione, but she was looking past me, her eyes wide and fearful with her mouth slightly open in a silent scream. I quickly turned to see what could scare her so and my heart stopped.

"YOU!" I screamed and whipped out my wand pointing it directly at the source of every bit of hideousness in my life, noticing the wand that was already out and the words already forming on his lips.

"AVADA KEDAVA!" He shrieked at me and I closed my eyes, waiting for the inevitable.

The silence was deafening. Even the entire crowd had silenced and I was shocked beyond realization that I had felt nothing, the death was painless. However a high cold voice snapped me out of my stupor and my eyes flew open.

"What is this…?" Voldemort hissed quietly staring directly at me. Finally it dawned on me that the killing curse that he had tried to cast never left his wand. He was powerless to kill me. Thinking quickly and without much thought I cried out my disarming spell.

The silence if possible multiplied tenfold and I stared at my wand astonished. Nothing happened. He still had his wand. Quickly he tried again.

"Avada Kedava!" He tried, determined to end my life. When once again nothing happened he tried more spells, some of which I recognized but most I didn't. Still in shock I took this opportunity to look up and observe the people that currently surrounded us.

There was everyone standing there staring at one of us or the other. Hermione, Bill, Charlie, Arthur, Molly, Ginny, Kinsley, Ron, all three Malfoys, Neville, Mrs. Longbottom, Umbridge, McGonagall… _everyone_. All dressed in random attire that I assumed they had been wearing before the light showed up. Ron was still in his Chudley Cannon pyjama bottoms and Lucius Malfoy had on his Azkaban imprisonment robes. Slowly people began taking out their wands and depending on their views began attempting to disarm, stun, or in the case of the few death eaters standing behind Voldemort, attempting to kill me. Nothing came out of the wands and soon a silence overcame the group.

Slowly the realization hit everyone. _We can't use magic… _

I turn my eyes back to Voldemort and see that he is currently observing the crowd with a slight self-righteous sneer and I begin to feel my anger set back in.

"Mudbloods and blood traitors one and all…" He whispers in parseltongue and my control snapped. I lunged at him trying to get a good punch in the face when he moved quickly and grabbed my wrist and twisted but no pain came. Then just as quickly as his defence started he let go with a shriek, staring at his hand.

Blinking I see what cause him to pull back. His pale, almost translucent skin is red, as if someone had placed his hand on a bed of hot coals for a few seconds. Taking my chance I make a fist and send it flying towards his face. He moves and it hits him in the arm. He hisses at the impact but I find myself distracted and quickly pull away at the feeling of pain in my hand. I look down and see the exact same redness on my hand as on his. Yelping I take another step back and look back at my enemy glaring, equally as mad as confused.

"What the fuck are you doing Riddle?" I spat out at him.

Not answering, his eyes narrowed. He opened his mouth to speak but suddenly something behind me seemed to catch his attention and his eyes widened in confusion. I quickly spin around, only partly realizing the danger of turning my back to my arch enemy, however quickly judging by the looks of everyone surrounding him there seems to actually be something behind me. What I see is actually far stranger that I imagined.

"Hello. My name is Gwendolyn. Welcome to here."

My eyes get wider at the site of the person or thing which now stood in front of me. Gwendolyn is seemingly shaped like a normal girl, average in every way except for her, or its long blonde silvery hair and white grey eyes. However the person is not actually a person… I think. She looks normal and talk's normal, but my senses are going into overdrive trying to concentrate on her. She doesn't really seem to be there.

Tearing my eyes from her I look around me. Hermione also seems to have a strange look on her face, as if she is concentrating far too hard on something.

"One of your wishes has come true. Watching this war of yours seems pointless to us, especially since there is a way to change it. You will change as well."

"What is this…?" A high voice one again voicing his confusion came from behind me and I nearly jumped out of my skin completely forgetting who I had my back turned to. I couldn't tear my eyes away from her…_ it_ though. She seemed to stare right through everyone as her eyes swept the crowd to look at the monster behind me.

"Are you responsible! Return my magic at once!" He half hissed half screamed at her. Her lips turned up slightly at him into a seemingly gentle smile. I didn't think it was possible for someone to smile so kindly at a man like him.

"I haven't taken away your magic. I have simply prohibited the act of violence while you are here. Both magically and physically. You will still be able to use your magic, just not to harm anyone." The silence following her small speech was incredible and I could almost hear the sound of eyes bugging out of their sockets.

"Welcome to here. If you would please walk onto the boat we can start your journey." She finishes her speech with a gesture to her right and all our heads turn to see the salty air seemingly move with the mist. A very large object that was hidden before was unveiled in, under less stressful circumstances, a most beautiful and slow way. The ship certainly was certainly larger than most and it seemed to have a vast amount of room. It was pulled up to port and there was a ramp set up for entering, which was the last thing I wanted to do at this point.

"We will not be going anywhere until you tell us who or what you are." Kinsley spoke up this time, voicing all of our thoughts and I found myself nodding. This Gwendolyn person doesn't seem real, yet there is now question that even though she seems an illusion, there is a great amount of power in not allowing us to focus on her directly and this makes me nervous. Who knows what she could do to us.

"I am Gwendolyn and I am a witch. However I can control a certain type of magic that you can't." The last part was stated rather bluntly and somehow I _knew_ who was going to take offence first…

"Impossible. What type of magic could you possibly control over Lord Voldemort?" I could actually hear the sneer in his voice as he indirectly stated that he felt superior to her even now. I resisted the urge to roll my eyes.

"You can't use magic to harm each other, and I brought you all here. Does that answer your question?" she paused here to gather her thoughts and it finally began to sink in that; indeed she did control something different if she could perform all of that. Although, I didn't believe for a minute that she wasn't hiding something. "There is something that witches and wizards like you need to understand that seems to be eluding you, or perhaps you are too afraid to think of it. Those you call muggles are unaware of your existence because you make it so. Is it not possible that someone, or some group, is doing the same to you? What makes your assembly so special and different from everyone else?" She spoke with great emphasis on these lines. Once again she had brought us to silence, but before we had enough time to process the information that she had given she was speaking again. "Now please get on the boat so you may begin."

"Begin what? We're not going anywhere until you explain!" One of the aurors yelled this time, one of the older men.

"Yes you are… I will get you on the ship now since you are unwilling to cooperate. Interestingly you will need to work together to get off of it. All of you." Her eyes bore onto me for the first time that night and I knew exactly who she was talking about when she said someone asked for another chance. I knew…

"Goodbye for now." Then she was gone in the mist and the ability to concentrate briefly returned before the same blinding light occurred.

"WAIT!" someone yelled, but their voice was drowned out in the yelling of the crowd again and that sensation of confusion returned.

The salty air remained even as the light disappeared and I found myself on the docks of the ship, my head spinning yet again.

"Bloody hell…" I heard Ron whisper somewhere to my left. My head, now capable of thought again, was going a million miles a minute. Was she the voice in my head that asked me if I was sure of my choice? I don't know. The voice in my head didn't really sound like a voice, more like a shadow or an echo of a thought. She must have been talking about me though. I made a choice in my head and now I am surrounded by people on a ship being watched by something that I don't even know is real. She knows my secret… She knows my thoughts if she was the reason we were all transported here. I feel helpless in this situation. I hear everyone around me trying to use their wands again and fight to get away from the death eaters and Voldemort but I can't bring myself to move. I am too much in thought. Besides, if she can stop us from using magic and hurting each other out there on the dock, then why not the two hundred feet away on the deck of a ship, which is now moving. I can feel it.

"We need to get out!" "Please let us go!" "What do you want!" "We'll never get out of here!" "If she doesn't kill us then _they_ will!"

"ENOUGH!" Hermione shocked me out of my thoughts. Everyone else seemed to be surprised by the sudden outburst as well because every person standing on the deck of the ship turned to look at her. "This is getting ridiculous! Obviously nothing is happening and it is a waste of energy for us all to be standing around pointing our wands and screaming at each other! While we are fighting we are still here and we should be trying to find a way out of here!" Silence, then everyone blinked. Finally, one of the death eaters spoke.

"Who put you in charge mudblood?" He sneered.

"Don't call her that!" Ron spoke up, still wearing his pyjama bottoms. His wand pointed at the death eater.

"Ron, don't bother! You're not going to be able to make them do anything. Let's just get away from them and look around. Maybe there is a way out." Hermione pleaded with her boyfriend. I could see Ron ready to lunge at the death eater.

"That's a good idea Hermione, _let's go Ron_. We will try to explore this place. Maybe that Gwendolyn or whatever she is forgot something before she imprisoned us." Kinsley spoke, his leadership skills breaking through as he all but ordered Ron to back off and away from the death eaters. Even as he spoke he was backing everyone away from them to an opening in the deck.

"Yes Ron, lets _go_." Hermione said firmly and grabbed his hand, leading him to the rest of the group. As the space between the two groups increased I could finally see the rest of the ship and I took the opportunity to look around briefly.

The boat was almost ridiculously sterile white. The deck was white, the rails were white, the ships walls were white, the chairs and benches on the dock were white. I turned my head to look at the front of the ship. The fog that was surrounding us at the dock was gone and in all directions there was nothing but blue sky and completely still water. We were moving, I was right, but there was nothing in sight anywhere. There were no land masses or even a cloud in the sky. The whole scene was actually rather terrifying. There was just nothing anywhere.

"Harry?" A voice asked and I quickly turned back. Ginny was standing just before the opening at the ship with her boyfriend halfway in and looking back and forth between us. "Come on." She said and gestured for me to come with her. I looked around. In my thinking I had stayed behind while everyone else had left. Now I was standing between the death eaters with Voldemort glaring at me and Ginny with her boyfriend. Who happened to be also glaring at me. It was almost a funny situation since I really didn't want to go anywhere. I just wanted to stand here on the deck of the ship. But of course I couldn't. I turned and walked towards Ginny.

"Better watch your back Potter! This is nowhere near over even if your mudblood friend saved you." One of the death eaters yelled and I stopped and turned my head, unable to resist the urge to reply. My anger and fury returning as I began to see red and I focused all my anger on the one person who had yet to say anything, as if judging the whole situation before taking any action.

"Shut the fuck up! What would you have done, huh? You're just as helpless here as we are so for now you better get used to us being around!" I practically screamed, only to silence myself suddenly as I realized the full extent of what I had just done. This essentially was yelling at a very large group of death eaters who all want to kill me.

"Go away Potter." The Dark Lord drawled distractedly before turning on his heel and walking away followed by the rest of the death eaters. Finally there was just me and the Malfoy's in the clearing. Obviously sure that they are out of favour with both sides, they simply stand together watching both side go. Sighing, I turn around and finish walking towards Ginny, but not before commenting to the Malfoy's.

"I don't think anyone is able to hurt each other here in any physical way. Just choose a side Malfoy. What's the worse that could happen?" And with that I turn away.

Going down the stairs of the ship with Ginny and her boyfriend I begin the think again. Why? I didn't understand and I am sure that no one else does either. I, however, have an idea of whose fault it is and it doesn't make me feel any better. I couldn't care less about Voldemort and his death eaters, but my friends. It is my fault they are entrapped here. Without any means of escaping. But why did she, it, choose this place, why now, and why with them? Why?

"Harry?" Hermione's voice broke me out of my trance as I realized I was down with the rest of the group and they gazed at me expectedly.

"Sorry… what?"

"Where do you think we should look first?" She gently asked, seeming to know that this was a very delicate situation. I looked behind me, back up the stairs before speaking again.

"I don't think Riddle and his group are going to be bothering us for a while. Let's just start at the bottom and work our way up, yeah?" She nodded once and immediately turned to the group and started yelling instructions to everyone, while I went back to my thoughts, which were still as mangled and confusing as before…

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